SELF-EXPERIENCE

Ātman is Self, or “I,” and Self is Ātman. It is a subject within every being, not the objects outside. It is the self-existent essence that persists for innumerable lifetimes. The Brihadaranyaka Upanishad says that this Ātman is itself the light that is witness-consciousness and pure intelligence. It realises everything through its own consciousness as a witness and discloses everything through its own intelligence. The Self is happiness, the infinite of infinite, non-dual consciousness that exists beyond time, space, and causation. Every being’s essence is the Self, which is umbilically Brahmān, also known as the Cosmic Self or Absolute Existence. We can't comprehend it, yet it is within us. Self-experience is an experience of the Self. It is an aspiration to know more in totality, as its source and culmination are Absolute Consciousness. It is to learn and identify the real from the apparent by way of discrimination. Experience, as outlined by Swami Krishnananda, is the totality of the conditions of consciousness, as to become aware of its contents. Experience is said to grow when one gains an increasing knowledge of the contents of one's consciousness. The grosser the contents and the more distant they are from the consciousness that apprehends them, the lesser is the knowledge of these contents that one is said to have, and the more meagre is the experience gained thereby. Experience is a Whole and cannot be fragmented into fragments. It affirms the presence of an Absolute-Experience as a unified system of organically connected, disparate contents and phases. A finite being with the finitude of sensual systems cannot comprehend the infinitude of eternity infused with the infinite consciousness, the Absolute. Much is implied in our lives, and this can be known only through critical and reflective consciousness.

It is to, as Sage Ashtavakra proclaims in the Ashtavakra Gita (15.4-6), recognise oneself in all beings, and all beings in oneself, be happy, free from the sense of responsibility, and free from preoccupation with 'me'. He further says that you are not the body, nor is the body yours, nor are you the doer of actions or the reaper of their consequences. You are eternally pure consciousness, the witness, in need of nothing. Desire and anger are objects of the mind, but the mind is not yours, nor ever has been. You are choiceless; awareness itself is unchanging, so live happily.

1. Outline

 Self, or Ātman is a fundamentally inseparable aspect of the Cosmic Self. It is endowed with Sat-Chit-Anand (eternal Existence-Consciousness-Bliss). The process of awakening, which is when one starts feeling yearning for the Self, is fundamentally related to the realisation of the Self. Its goal is to unite with the Cosmic Self; this is its genesis and orientation. Its intrinsic nature is that only. As it attempts to savour the objects of the senses and descends farther into the darkness of ignorance, it gets derailed in its own identification as the body-mind-intellect system takes on an embodied form. In this way, it becomes forgetful of its own self to enjoy the objects of the senses. Realising its own self as a part of the Cosmic Self requires several reincarnations in order to uncover the veil of ignorance. When the realisation is at its fullest, it becomes one in completeness with Cosmic Self.

According to Swami Krishnananda, self-experience unfolds as the experience of truth as well as the experience of error. Generally speaking, truth is understood to be total, complete and uncontradictory. And that experience is called the experience of Ultimate Truth because it cannot be transcended by any other experience. The term "error experience" refers to an experience that, although it seems real while it is a form or process of consciousness, can be refuted and transcended by another experience. But as life has shown, it is untrue that all mistakes are created equal or exhibit the same level of disagreement with reality. An event could involve a mistake, but it could also involve a bigger or smaller mistake, that is, something closer or farther from the truth. We are familiar with degrees of error, which implies that we are also familiar with degrees of truth.

Self-experience is becoming conscious of the Self. It involves remaining steadfast to the original nature of being, arising awake, not sleeping, and getting up from the deep slumber of ignorance in the objective dimension to the subjective realm to relish the consciousness of the Self, aphoristically declares Kathopanishad (1-3-14). It highlights that the Self of whom many are not even able to hear, whom many, even when they hear of him, do not comprehend; wonderful is a man, when found, who is able to teach the Self; wonderful is he who comprehends him, when taught by an able teacher (Kathopanishad: 2-7).

The Self in embodied form passes experiences through wakefulness, dreaming, deep sleep, and Turiya. These are, according to Swami Sivananda, the four halves of this Ātman. Turiya is all happiness, non-dual, transcendental, and devoid of phenomenal existence. It is indeed Omkara.

In the other three states, waking, dreaming, and deep sleep self-experience phenomenal attachments, as the mind is the prime mover in the thought manufacturing processes of the opposites, pleasure-pain, happiness-distress, joy-sorrow, etc.

2. Scriptures

Scriptures vouch for Self-consciousness, Self-realisation through discrimination based on real-unreal, knowledge-ignorance and “I”-”I.” Self experiences Self only as the veil of ignorance is uncovered. Self-experiences are myriad, like waves in an ocean, declares the Ashtavakra Gita (15.5-7), but your nature is the consciousness, in which the whole world wells up, like waves in the sea. Have faith; don't let yourself be deluded by this. You are yourself the Lord, whose property is knowledge and is beyond natural causation. That is what you are, without any doubt, so be free of disturbance. 

Adi Shankaracharya says take away the self-imposed veil of ignorance to realise Brahmān, the Cosmic Self to elevate into the threshold of liberation.  It is because the Self experiences threefold misery—the ádhyátmika (those pertaining to the body and mind, such as pain, anguish etc.) the adhidaivika (those coming from divine visitations or scourges of Nature, such as cyclone, earthquake etc.), and the adhibhautika (those due to other creatures on earth). Discriminate between the real and unreal as this Mine of Bliss is Self’s very nature. It is no external thing to be acquired. They have simply to realise that they are already That.

The inquiry of the "I" and its nature possesses an enticing allure for all thoughtful minds, says Bhagwan Ramana Maharshi. The only surefire way to discover who you truly are—an unchanging, absolute being—is through self-enquiry. The combination of the individual self (the "I") and the ultimate existence (also the "I"), which is considered to be the same as the self, is symbolised by the word "I-I.". This philosophy holds that the ultimate self is a global consciousness that permeates all of existence rather than being restricted to the particular ego.

That which thou seest as neither this nor that, as neither effect nor cause, as neither past nor future, tell me that, declares Kathopanishad (2.14-20). That word (or place) which all the Vedas record, which all penances proclaim, which men desire when they live as religious students—that word, I tell thee briefly, is Om. That (imperishable) syllable means Brahmān; that syllable means the highest (Brahmān); he who knows that syllable, whatever he desires,is his. This is the best support; this is the highest support; he who knows that support is magnified in the world of Brahmâ (the creator of the creation).The knowing (Self) is not born; it dies not; it sprang from nothing, nothing sprang from it. The Ancient is unborn, eternal, and everlasting; he is not killed, though the body is killed. If the killer thinks that he kills, if the killed thinks that he is killed, they do not understand, for this one does not kill, nor is that one killed. The Self, smaller than small and greater than great, is hidden in the heart of that creature. A man who is free from desires and from grief sees the majesty of the Self by the grace of the Creator.

The Taitrriya Upanishad says one experiences the Self, which is Brahmān. It denotes that Brahmān indeed is Satyam-Jñānam-Anantam Brahma, or Brahmān is truth, knowledge, and infinite. One who knows that Brahmān exists in the intellect, which is lodged in the supreme space in the heart, enjoys, in identification with the all-knowing Brahmān, all desirable things simultaneously. From that, Brahmān, which is the Self, was indeed able to produce space. From space emerged air. From the air was born fire. From the fire came water. Water sprang up from the earth. From earth were born the herbs. From the herbs, food was produced. From food came humans. That human, such as one is, is a product of the essence of food. In this way, even though Brahmān is one's Self, It can remain unattained through ignorance. Just as through ignorance, there is a non-discovery (in the story ) of the individual oneself who makes up the requisite number, and just as there is the discovery of the self-same person through knowledge when one is reminded of that personage by someone, similarly in the case of one, to whom Brahmān in Its own nature remains thus unattained owing to one's ignorance, there can quite reasonably be a discovery of that very Brahmān by realising that omnipresent Brahmān to be none other than one's own Self.

 3. Remarks

Experience is a learning experience that has to be learned in every way. Our opportunities from experience arise from the depths of our being as subjects. No learning experience belongs merely to one side of our lives. Experiencing is in a context of interplay in the realm of subject (sensient) and object (insensient). According to Swami Krishnananda, learners studying scripture are expected to analyse every angle of a given circumstance, even if it is an ordinary occurrence. Even though a tiny occurrence may seem trivial to the average person, it is nonetheless a cosmic event. However, not everything is as unnecessary as it seems. At the beginning of every event, the cosmos is awake. For this reason, we are informed that everything in our world is common, transparent, and open, and that there is no such thing as a secret. A situation needs to be looked at from a variety of perspectives. Most of the time, we have a tendency to look at things from one perspective. For instance, we examine subjects solely from our point of view and interpret them as such, as though there is no other background at all. Again, other viewpoints just consider their own perspectives. Some people are religious and apply a theological interpretation to everything, and so forth. Swami Krishnananda further says that, without a doubt, the cosmos is objective. The objectivity of the occurrence must also be taken into consideration, as it seems as though the world is outside of us. However, as subjects, we participate in what seems to be an objective event. There is a subjective component to the event insofar as we, as subjects, engage in its objectivity. Therefore, neither an event nor a situation can be claimed to be entirely objective or subjective. Any event that occurs involves the blending of the objective and the subjective, the inner and the outward. Every occurrence has an underlying, transcending meaning as well. There is a final deciding factor that necessitates the objective and subjective parts to react in that way; it is not just the world and the individual that react upon each other. We frequently refer to this transcendence as God's will. Because an event takes place in a social setting, there is also a social component to it. A group of people is not the only thing we mean when we talk about society. Whether it is human or not, society is generally an ordered system. And whichever organisation this is—it may be a family, an institution, or all of humanity—any event that takes place in a structured environment has an effect on it.

-Asutosh Satpathy